What is your Utopia

 

Conrad looked down at his reflection on the surface of the water, the basin was there for him to wash up after the speech. His nerves were still feeling like they were on fire, the lord had blessed him with the power of speech and now he is taking that power and building the Utopia he always envisioned. The crowd was good and the tithing they were giving allowed him some luxuries, as the lord permitted, to keep him going. The roads were long and arduous, but he will find his way to the land of Utopia. The cool water felt good on his skin, Conrad stood up and looked for the towel and began drying his face.

“What really is Utopia Mr. Borne? Is it the promised land of milk and honey for all? Or is it the land of unending pleasure for the god sent founder?”

“What, who, this is my private room. How did…”

The figure stood next to the door, he looked important. The suit looked expensive and so did the walking cane with a stone at the end that looked like a gold nugget. His face had sharp features and his eye twinkled like there was something behind them like a diamond. He had a smile on face that could have easily reached his ears, also he had no beard unlike Conrad’s founder beard. The man just stood there looking at Conrad with the smile on his face and not speaking a word.

Conrad dropped the towel with annoyance and tried speak to the intruder and tell him to leave. It was then he noticed that his voice was gone, he could not even utter a sound. It was as if the lord had taken his voice.

“That is not the work of your so called lord Mr. Borne. I needed your attention and it entailed that I bottle that loud and uncouth voice of yours.”

Conrad was ready to throw something at this man, this demon, Conrad was the vessel of the lord and … and yet he felt like he should listen to this intruder. Looking down at his shoes that were still shiny from the walking all round the stage Conrad could still discern his reflection on them and then looked at the intruder again and waited.

The intruder’s smile waned and he walked forward to stand to a seat where he sat and indicated to Conrad to sit across him. Conrad hesitated at first but then relented and moved to sit across the intruder. Nothing was spoken for a good long while and Conrad was beginning to wonder why no one else was knocking at his door. This room was a changing room for the stage he was on. There was a mirror on the opposite side of the room with a chair in front of it and next to the mirror was a dressing table and at the centre of the room were a few chairs and a sofa for Conrad to rest after his speech.

“I was uninterested in your whole con for the longest time but recently I found myself seeing that you are really gathering people in your shadow and with honesty I must say. I will give you back your voice but with a caveat that you will not raise the alarm, I would not have this place turn into a scene of a foolish tragedy.”

“This is not a con… my voice. How did you.. are you a demon?”

The intruder barked out a laugh and Conrad saw that he had finely kept teeth that also glittered when the light hit them. Everything about this intruder led to Conrad believing that he was a demon.

“I am no demon or devil, what I am what you cannot fathom. I walk this world seeing the progress of every creature and man has become the most interesting parasite of them all.”

“Parasite? Humanity is no parasite sir. We have tamed the land and beast to show the lord our…”

“Tamed or raped? How can you be so sure, I have seen creatures driven to complete extinction for the profit of the few. I have seen women and children raped by men of your god in his name. You are no different, in fact your great great grandfather was part of a massacre that saw the pillaging and executions of over six thousand natives. All for what you ask, all for the land they lived on, is that the way of the lord you ask?”

Conrad sat there looking at the intruder unable to speak, now his voice was held back by himself, “we are, I am, the lord gave me a path to peace and that very path will lead me and my followers to the one true Utopia. I have seen it..”

“Have you now? Or was it a fever dream that you saw while lying in the gutter drunk on  back-alley moonshine?”

Conrad hesitated, this intruder knew more that he appeared and now the fear of being in front of a real demon was boiling up from his stomach. Conrad wanted to run from this room, was this the lord trying to tempt off the path or was this something darker.

“There is no point in running Mr. Borne, I will find you wherever you hide. I mentioned that I wasn’t interested in this new con of yours. If I am being honest, there is nothing godly in this movement at all, I see how the funds suddenly disappear here and end up in the hands of a whore in the saloon four streets down. You are a man of vice and saw something in that dream that I have seen in others. I want to ask you, do you know what Utopia really is?”

This conversation was giving him a headache and he really needed a drink now, Conrad looked around for his bottle and glass but there was none. If he made it out alive from here Conrad thought, he would make sure to give little Bill a good hiding to make sure that Bill never forgot again the bottle.

“The vice of man will never end, you want a drink but there is none to be seen, you have a headache and there is nothing to drink. Do you really think you have a headache or is it that you finally understand that I know more about you than you know about yourself Mr. Borne. You were born to an unfortunate mother who was too young to keep you and to a father who did not care about you. You grew up in a religious house that thrived on the bastardized understanding of what religion was supposed to be, had to endure whippings every night before sleep for eating your food the wrong way. Should I go on?”

“What do you want?” asked Conrad as he sat uncomfortably on the chair.

“You had a dream of a Utopia and I want to know what it means to you. I have seen that same expression when you talk about it to the masses, that same expression was on other men who turned their people into rabid masses that slaughtered other people in their names. I have seen nations burn in the name of that Utopia. Tell me what you saw.”

“I..” Conrad hesitated; he tried to remember the dream he saw in his dream. A city that was clean and safe, people walking about enjoying their lives while children playing in their playgrounds and homes without the fear. A city run by common law while having places of worship for the faithful to pray for abundance and mercy. He saw the heathens below the city toiling away in the dark making sure the city ran like clockwork.

“I saw a city made of light, it.. it was safe for everyone and there were no wars. The children were free to play and explore their new world. I saw abundance like never before, no hunger nor pain, I … I…”

“You saw the very same thing that every person on the street imagines Utopia to be, how do you think such a Utopia can be achieved?”

“I know it can be achieved; I have the path etched in my soul. That path will lead all to that land of prosperity,” Conrad almost shouted.

“I have seen the crowds grow over time and the word spread like a disease. I have seen men with the hunger of power in their eyes flock to your speeches, you have become a beacon for the hopeful and deceitful alike. I only came to see if you were any different but alas you are as frail as the ones before. You will fade in time and if not, then you will cause the death of thousands, if not millions, in finding your path to Utopia.”

Conrad did not say anything as he lowered his head. He mumbled something that caught the attention of the intruder who leaned forward, “speak up Mr. Borne, what did you say?”

“What is Utopia?”

The intruder sat back and the smile returned broader than before. “Do you really want to know?”

Conrad nodded and sat back.

“Utopia is a land of fools, A city that is clean as it is safe. People have plenty in their pockets and their bellies, the law is strong as it absolute. The shared knowledge is everywhere, praising the founder and his apostles. There is no dissidence here only obedience. People are given thoughts to chew on while children are taught to obey the word of the founder like gospel. Anyone not born with the same skin color is relegated to work under the Utopia as the machines that run the city. The books talk of the founder and his fight against the heathen masses and the sacrifices made in the name of Utopia. Sound familiar?”

Conrad nodded, he began to understand now. This intruder may not be a demon, but his knowledge is greater than anyone Conrad ever knew.

“I am no demon, again, Mr. Borne. I am what I am but evil is not my path. Think about what I said. You are walking that same path and if you see it to the end then I will see history repeating itself and the pain and suffering that I have loathed for so long will be worse.”

With that the intruder got up and walked out the door. Conrad was left in shock; this was not what he envisioned. He wanted to… what did he really want he asked himself. Conrad was now confused; he heard a knock at the door and Bill walked in with a tray. The tray contained his bottle of whisky and a glass; Conrad waved him away and told him to leave and take the bottle with him.

As Bill left Conrad got up and walked to the mirror and looked at the stranger in the mirror, he could not recognize the man that stood across him. This was not what he wanted, he did not want to become another tyrant nor great man, all this was just another con to make a few thousand and disappear. The visions of Utopia flooded his mind and it left him reeling by the speed of visions and memories, the false promises of peace and prosperity, the power of being a prophet in this Utopia. All this flooded his mind and it caused him to lean on the dresser to keep from falling, then he saw the rivers of blood that flowed out from the city. The men, women and children dying in the grottoes beneath the city, how the gears were lubricated with the blood of the undesirables. His hands began to shake as his left opened the drawer while the right picked up the pistol that lay within. Slowly it made its way to his right temple and Conrad stood there looking at the reflection of man holding a pistol to his head and wondering why he was doing that when the hammer fell.